Can I Have an iBed Please
It seems to me that humankind is lagging behind in a few key areas of technology. I am reading about Anthropology and DNA and the technology behind these areas of discovery are very impressive. Even in our 21st century everyday lives we have TIVO, DVDs inside our Escalades, GPS, iPod, iPhone and for some unknown reason 26 inch chrome wheels. How about putting some effort into a device where we spend a third of our lives. The Bed. How long has the box spring and mattress idea been around? When are we gonna get an iBed? Even if we could just get Magic Fingers, that would be a start. That way I’m not always running down to the local motel for a little relaxing jiggle.
I did see a commercial for something called the Sleep Numbered Bed. In this bed each sleeper can choose the firmness of their side by selecting a number. I wonder how that works on a night when everybody is feeling a little frisky. Do the two parties have to negotiate a mutually agreeable number before the…. well you know... event? Does that spoil the mood? “No last time it was a 4, and this time I think an 8 would be better” “We always have to use your number”. These days I can practically pick the hair and eye color of my next child if I want to, but this is the best they can do with my bed.
Steve Jobs, if you are listening, maybe you can wire up my bed and hook it into the net. Then, with a click and a press on the touch pad I can order a pizza, watch a DVD and maybe even get a bed time story, while being jiggled, before I go nigh, nigh. Please add a web cam so I can keep an eye on my bed from work and make sure no one has been sleeping on my side and messing with the numbers.
Oh yea, I want my jet pack one of these days too!!
I did see a commercial for something called the Sleep Numbered Bed. In this bed each sleeper can choose the firmness of their side by selecting a number. I wonder how that works on a night when everybody is feeling a little frisky. Do the two parties have to negotiate a mutually agreeable number before the…. well you know... event? Does that spoil the mood? “No last time it was a 4, and this time I think an 8 would be better” “We always have to use your number”. These days I can practically pick the hair and eye color of my next child if I want to, but this is the best they can do with my bed.
Steve Jobs, if you are listening, maybe you can wire up my bed and hook it into the net. Then, with a click and a press on the touch pad I can order a pizza, watch a DVD and maybe even get a bed time story, while being jiggled, before I go nigh, nigh. Please add a web cam so I can keep an eye on my bed from work and make sure no one has been sleeping on my side and messing with the numbers.
Oh yea, I want my jet pack one of these days too!!
posted by Unknown at
12:36 PM
3 Comments:
I agree. Beds should be hipper. My bed should pick me up, from wherever I am, and take me to my bedroom when it's time to sleep.
It should also warm, or cool, the sheets depending on the weather.
Yes, Hello iBed, I'd like a #6 setting at 65 degrees with a slight east to west jiggle, and a large pepperoni pizza.... stat.
OK Goldilocks, expecting to have a bed that does everything for you might be the ultimate in laziness. Which of course would be perfect for me, but I just don't see it for you. I think we just have to be happy with a remote control and a cell phone at our fingertips.
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